{"product_id":"premium-matte-paper-poster-13x18-cm-5x7-i-put-mayo-on-everything","title":"'I Put Mayo On Everything' Poster — A Condiment. A Lifestyle. A Dealbreaker.","description":"\u003cp\u003eIn the beginning, there was mayonnaise. Full fat. Homemade if possible. Unapologetic always. The kind of mayo that a well-stocked fridge would actually produce — not the pale, low-cal, \"light\" version that sits sadly next to the diet yogurt and the other signs that something has gone very wrong.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe jar did not say light. The jar had standards. The jar understood that fat is not the enemy. Fat is the point. Fat is where the flavour lives, where the texture is, where the joy is. Fat is, frankly, correct.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe \u003cstrong\u003eI Put Mayo On Everything\u003c\/strong\u003e poster is for everyone who has made peace with full-fat condiments and will not be going back. Who puts mayo on their eggs without apologising. Who dips their fries, their vegetables, their life choices — in mayo — and feels, with every bite, that they are living correctly and in alignment with good taste and also basic common sense.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt is also, not coincidentally, for everyone who has ever been offered a \"light\" alternative and felt a small but significant part of themselves die.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e🥄 I Put Mayo On Everything — a philosophy, a dietary framework, a dealbreaker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e🌸 Pink background, white typography — bold, warm, the color of someone who eats properly\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e🖼️ 200 gsm premium matte paper — smooth, non-reflective, like someone who has never once doubted their condiment choice\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e🌿 FSC-certified sustainable paper — because good taste and environmental responsibility are not mutually exclusive\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e📐 13×18 cm \/ 5×7″ — small format, enormous conviction\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e✨ Printed on demand — no minimums, no compromises, no light mayo\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003ePut it on everything. Hang the poster. L'chaim. 💙\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Phyllis Tulazsewski - Joyful Objects","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":53116867871048,"sku":"c57af3d8-3024-4e83-bed1-822f98e9c4ac","price":24.0,"currency_code":"EUR","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0956\/3481\/7352\/files\/I_put._mayo_on_everything_poster_mockup.jpg?v=1779077642","url":"https:\/\/phyllis-tulaszewski.com\/products\/premium-matte-paper-poster-13x18-cm-5x7-i-put-mayo-on-everything","provider":"Phyllis Tulaszewski - Joyful Objects","version":"1.0","type":"link"}