you ever caught yourself saying yes when your gut actually told you to say 'hell noooo'?!
Then hear me out! I'm with you!
And yes, I'm very familiar with the disease to please. But hey, let's face reality: most people are never pleased anyways
It was pretty mind-boggling to me whenever I finally understood that saying no does wonders - especially when it means saying no to something you clearly don't want.
You have every fucking right to say no to things you don't want.
Don't wanna go to that party? Then it's a no. Just going there to not piss someone else off? That's not a good reason to agree.
And saying no isn't selfish. People demanding from you to overstep your own boundaries - that is selfish!
So, saying no is actually good for you.
You should do it more often from now on if you struggle with the disease to please. And yes, it can be learned.
Even in my professional freelance working environment I started saying no to things that just didn't feel right.
What happened you might wonder? Did I piss people off? No, not all. Instead everyone was happier then since I decided to not agree anymore on things that I never felt like agreeing on at the first place.
And now I wanna know from you. Do you struggle with saying no? Or have you found a good way to say no? Hit reply and let me know!
xo - Phyllis
P.S. I know that for many of us it is very difficult to finally learn that saying no is our right without feeling guilty about it. And if you struggle here, it's something that can be learned. Pssst...I'm working on a 'how to say no' cheat sheet - stay tuned!
P.P.S. this was my latest newsletter. if you enjoyed reading this and want it straight in your inbox, then subscribe right here!
https://phyllistulaszewski.kit.com/1fa54ee96d